The beginning of school: Sanity returns

Here’s our editorial from GTWoman’s Sept/Oct issue… now that the kids have been in school several weeks, it turns out we’re psychic because this stuff is all happening.

The summer was one for the books. Lots of hot sun, wild kids and laughter long after bedtime. It’s not to say we didn’t love it, but there is something delicious about the start of school…. when someone else starts telling your kids where to be and when.

Things that shall re-commence now that school has begun:

Electronics shall return to their rightful owner.
How many iPhone induced rages can a girl handle in a summer? Try about three a day at our households. Every time we turned around to use our phones, they were not where we’d left them. But rather, for example, Kandy’s was running on a 1 percent battery in Star Wars sheets of a twin bed. Cue the rage.
Editor’s note: Plug in and repeat one hour later.

Staying up late shall be a treat.
The magic is back. We, as parents, can now grant this and take it away, ground and unground like sleight of hand. No longer is every night a debate. There are now five glorious school nights to observe and, when it comes to late nights, our reign is back in session. Be sure these don’t coincide with wine nights.

Sports equipment shall be put away.
Kandy’s husband ran over a soccer ball a few mornings ago while leaving the driveway. A soccer ball the children were told to put away and/or shove under the back tire of the truck out of sight. The same soccer ball that spent the entire summer on the front lawn with various sides fading in the sun, killing perfect circles of grass. Not once did Kandy see the ball actually get kicked, touched or netted. The same soccer ball Kandy thought was a small, fierce animal each time she was the last one outside at night. To have it end like this seemed melodramatic yet fitting.

The couch shall be sit-upon-able during the day.
Cushions shall be in place; forts shall be dismantled. Oh the simple joy of sitting in the living room and not feeling the springs too low and too hard coming up to meet you. Also, being able to see the floor, the tops of end tables and the face of the TV is nice too. You’ll discover pieces of furniture you forgot you had. Consider it a housewarming party.

Lunch shall be actually eaten.
What if we sat through a whole sandwich and didn’t have to make another, wipe a face (ours included), draw an imaginary line between two brawling children, fish a Lego out of a milk glass or confiscate a deck of Pokémon cards from below the table? Delicious, we say, better than a sandwich could ever be.

Decent appearance shall commence.
Well, with Kerry’s girl Brook, that was never an issue…but as for the boys… tattered shoes, be gone. We can now demand a higher dress code. Hair shall be brushed, cut even. Toenails shall be clean, cut even. And PJs shall not be worn all day; clothes shall be donned. (We will, however, adhere to the opposite dress code.)

Here’s to the arrival of fall! Enjoy the changes that accompany it and, come next summer, we’ll be ready to take on the craziness of a houseful of kids again!

1 Comment

  1. Amen sista.