Fat Cats


My sister and I have a competition over whose cat is the fattest. It seems just right to reveal this just in time for our GTWoman Health issue.

It was an accidental kind of competition. One day my sister Kerry mentioned that her cat was fat. I scoffed. Kerry’s cat, CoCo, wasn’t even on the fat radar.

CoCo was strong, long and built with plenty of room to distribute her weight. My FatCat, on the other hand, carried her weight like a barrel. She can’t be picked up because there’s nowhere to get a good grip on her.

So, we weighed our cats after a long text debate one night. They were both 14 lbs. A tie.

We decided it was like a short woman and a tall woman carrying the same extra 10 lbs. A short woman had nowhere to put it. But a tall woman could get away with it until the moment she sat down and everything was brought to the forefront (i.e. her lap).


CoCo is tall and FatCat is short. They are both 14 lbs., but a very different 14 lbs.

Then something terrible happened. My FatCat suffered a horrible injury that put her in bandages for three months. She was burned when a heating pad was left on during surgery and lost most of the skin and hair on one entire side of her body. She had to be treated and wrapped for months. And, at one point, syringe fed. She lost weight in the most awful way.

Suddenly FatCat was svelte. She lost 2 lbs. (10% goal, nailed it) and her skin hung loose below her belly. She began shopping for a new wardrobe, plus a new man.

But it didn’t last long. The moment FatCat was able to feed herself again, the diet was off and the comfort food was on. I bought every food I could find in an attempt to get my sick kitty eating again.

And every time FatCat ate, I squealed with delight. My kitty was finally feeling better. Now was certainly not the time to be worrying about weight.

At this point, Kerry’s CoCo was out of the running. FatCat was coming back from her deathbed and Fancy Feast was the only bucket on her list.

Well. It’s been six months and FatCat is now 17 lbs. of uneven fur and constant purrs. She is a calico Garfield, alert to lasagna in the house, sleeping all day and most certainly not letting you pick her up.

But just as FatCat took the podium, CoCo marched in out of nowhere. Kerry announced triumphantly that her cat also weighed 17 lbs. How could this be? CoCo had been on a vet-mandated diet for the same six months!

Well, upon further inspection, it turned out Kerry was still feeding her 2-year-old cat KITTEN CHOW. She was measuring out high-calorie food very precisely every morning and every night.

No wonder CoCo was strong and athletic. She was fueling correctly and teaching spin two nights at a week at the gym.

So, it seems that both of our cats are destined to be fat cats. One tall, one short. They may carry their weight differently but they both love to cuddle and then, without warning and while still purring, put the hurt on us. And we wouldn’t have it any other way.

Here’s to our Health issue… filled with fat cats, cuddling and comfort foods!

This was the GTWoman editorial for our Sept/Oct 2017. The full issue is here.